my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
He shit in the fireplace
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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