HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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