This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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