Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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