I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?