That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
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