Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You were trust falling into bushes
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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