I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
