I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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