I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
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