Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
