wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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