I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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