I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
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