I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
