So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
