Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
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