He is like the real live version of the state fair..
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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