He felt like a one man threesome
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Actions speak louder than pants.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
