if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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