I'm laying in your front yard are you home
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize