There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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