so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
