Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
