Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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