Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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