What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
