Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
And then the night went full on bisexual.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
