I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
