I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Randomize
