So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
