do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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