You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I enjoy the company of your penis
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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