did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
