he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Randomize
