chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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