Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
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