I feel like I'm in dance class right now
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
