I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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