Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
