I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
