Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize