she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Randomize