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• (248): View more from Michigan

  I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.

  (773): View more from Illinois

  "We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.

  Fav 21 1115 1853

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary

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• (425): View more from Washington

  Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.

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• 

  23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (303): View more from Colorado

  why does he always try to puke into shot glasses

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.

  (1-773): View more from Illinois

  I love you football head

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.

  Fav 9 1785 677

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.

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  These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???

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• (941): View more from Florida

  Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.

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• (415): View more from California

  He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest

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• (212): View more from New York

  She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?

  Fav 1 132 8

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.

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