just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
