wat bout pragnant strippers??
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
