I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Randomize
