How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
only you would photoshop your dick
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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