My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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