I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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